Soy Vay!

A Jewish-Asian Barnard Experience

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Anonymous asked: Hi, I already apologized to Jo but after seeing your text post I think I need to give one to you too. It's no excuse, but I guess nerves were getting to me and I was just going way too far and personal with the questions. I'm really sorry, and I for one really do feel very thankful and special that both of you (and college-advice) are willing to share so much about your experiences at the university. I might not have even come here before hearing from you guys. Sorry again.

No problem. Just be careful in the future. This is a very sweet message, btw. :)

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Anonymous asked: hey! so im going to be in sulz, and tbh am not much of a poster fan? I'm also just god awful at decorating is there any blog or something you could point me to with easy ideas on how to spice up the walls? or maybe what you did? seems like Christmas lights are a to-go, should I ask my roomate if it's ok if I get those? thank you so much!

A key part of making your room feel like home is to not just focus on the walls, but to also focus on other parts of the room:

  • Floor: A rug will help make your room feel more homey—who actually likes linoleum floors???
  • Lighting: being able to adjust and customize the lighting definitely brightens your room. Christmas lights are standard and obvious, but you can also get a pretty or cute desk or floor lamp. You can also find more creative Christmas lights, such as the ones with origami, and I once saw someone hang a pretty light fixture with a paper covering from the ceiling. Also, lava lamps anyone?
  • Windows: get some window markers if you like drawing on windows or want to keep notes or reminders or something. Also, you can bring your own curtains.
  • Bed: probably obvious, but do get a cute comforter, possibly one with designs. Bring stuffed animals and cute pillows, too.
  • Walls: really, walls are the ones I have the most suggestions for:
    • You can get stock paper, contact paper, or similar that has a blackboard surface on it.
    • You can also bring photos to put on the wall.
    • A wall calendar might be helpful, too.
    • You could find a reslife approved way to hang a bulletin board or a dry erase board (let me know when you have one because my life would be complete if I had a dry erase board in my room).
    • A lot of the posters I have aren’t really posters but are more of memorabilia I’ve acquired over the years—one is actually a protest sign from a rally against education budget cuts; one is a Decemberists poster from the Decemberists album signing party I stumbled into a few years ago; I also have a few random crafts/artwork that have been gifted to me or that are somehow significant on my walls.
    • You might not like posters, per se, but perhaps a print of your favorite piece of art—Van Gogh goes well with most college aged people’s aesthetics, so does Chagall (or at least they go well with my aesthetic, lol).
    • One of my friends hangs synthetic flowers and leaves from her walls. They’re pretttty.
  • General: bring things that will make you feel at home. While you definitely shouldn’t bring your entire personal collection, do bring a few books and a few DVDs that you enjoy. Bring your favorite stuffed animal. Bring some lavender sprigs or some nice air refresher. Bring things that will make you happy and comfortable.

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Anonymous asked: oh my god i didn't know about the title IX complaint i am so sorry you went through that.

I’ve mentioned it on here a few times in passing. Thanks for the condolences. :)

Let me know if you have questions about the process and I can answer them either privately or publicly. (Serious questions about this only, please.)

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satisfiedwithimperfections asked: Hey! Hope your semester is less aggravating than my senior year lol. A Barnard rep is visiting my school tomorrow & I can't wait to hear more abt your college :) OH and I visited Columbia a week or so ago & it was so perfect omg. *breaks into tears over admit rate lol* I wish I could've visited Barnard, but I had to drive to another college right after

This is old but thought I’d post it because cute prospies

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On discretion and disclosure

Throughout the course of this blog I have been extremely open about a lot of things, both here and in the Barnard 2018 Facebook group (most of y’all know who I am there), including: homesickness; having filed a Title IX complaint; my sex/love life; my (lack of) experience with alcohol/drugz; and many other very personal things that I really don’t have to disclose to anyone.

I talk about them because I can and I feel like it—I am in a position right now where it is safe for me to do so without risk to my professional and social reputation; I feel that my experiences can be genuinely helpful for you guys; and, most importantly, I feel comfortable sharing them. I absolutely under no circumstances am obligated to share these things with you and you guys should feel pretty goddamn special that I do.

Which brings me to my next point: I have a very high personal comfort level with disclosing these things to the public via my blog, but not everyone does, not even Jo. And that doesn’t mean that Jo is a prude or that she’s “modest and appropriate”; that just means that Jo has a different level of comfort in sharing personal details. If Jo or myself doesn’t take your extremely personal questions “seriously”, that is us using discretion and establishing our boundaries (or we’re laughing at the fact that the topic of boys is a dead horse that has been beaten far too mercilessly).

Jo and I both spend a lot of time on these blogs because we enjoy it. What we do is not for everyone and you guys are extremely fortunate to have people as candid and personal as Jo and I to answer your thirsty anonymous questions. But we demand a certain level of respect in exchange for our services that some of you, quite frankly, have not attained.

If you are dissatisfied with the way Jo or myself handles highly personal questions, please ask yourself: is this a question that you would be comfortable answering in a public forum where a lot of people in real life know it’s you?

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Anonymous asked: Tried asking jo about boys n sex but she didn't take it seriously so ugh but Ty seriously for your post. I guess I am just wanting someone to tell me "YOURE GONNA BE FINE A BOY IS GOING TO LOVE YOU!" But obviously that's not something anyone can tell me. Thanks for being so helpful, hopefully I meet you this fall!

Holla at me, seriously. I love meeting new people.

You will find love and a boy and sex, but it won’t happen on pure luck alone. Most people don’t have romantic CATCH HIS GAZE IN A COFFEE SHOP, BLUSH, AND IMMEDIATELY FALL IN LOVE stories. But I believe that you can create your own love story. :)

EDIT: it’s kinda weird that you labeled Jo as “appropriate and modest” and then preceded to harass her about her sex life but got miffed when she didn’t want to share.

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g0lightly asked: For the Sulz anon: I stayed in Sulz for a month for precollege, and I agree, it was spacious! Being stuff for the walls, because they feel sparse, closet space is doable but not ideal for someone like me, and BRING A MATTRESS PAD. Although, that may be a general dorm life thing.


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Anonymous asked: Hi! I got assigned a double in Sulz! Any tips?

Lucky you! Sulz is very nice and has super spacious doubles. The triples aren’t as spacious and the quads are converted study lounges, so they’re spacious but awkwardly shaped. Because Sulz is so new, you don’t need to worry about too many additional things. The lighting in Sulz doesn’t hurt your eyes and the walls aren’t as putrid of a color as the walls in Reid are. Bring closet space saving devices (such as hangers that can hold like five articles) because the closet space is substandard. I don’t know much more about Sulz, though. Any tips from upperclassmen?

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Anonymous asked: what are the 8th floor hewitt freshmen rooms like? hewitt in general? does it have the "character" of brooks? are there good views?

I’ve never seen the doubles in Hewitt, but maybe someone in the tag has. Last summer, I wandered into one of the triples in Hewitt because it was unlocked and vacant and I was bored—it looked bigger than the Sulz triples that I’ve seen, but it was definitely awkwardly shaped. In general, rooms on the 8th floor of Hewitt and Brooks are bigger, but have slanted ceilings. Hewitt rooms do have the same older “character” that Brooks does. Hewitt’s views, however, are of the buildings in front of it, as those buildings are much taller than Hewitt.

I lived in Hewitt singles both last summer and last semester and, to be honest, I hated it. Living in Hewitt is isolating as an upperclassman as there isn’t really a hall community and no one really goes to RAs’ programs, plus the meal plan is frustrating. However, living in Hewitt as a freshman will be a much different experience than living in the quad as a sophomore or upperclassman. You will still have a First Year Focus RA and you will be surrounded by freshmen who will want to be friends with you. Hewitt will probably be nice because Hewitt tends to be quieter than the other dorms in the quad, if you strongly prefer quiet. Don’t expect to become bffs with upperclassmen on your hall, though, as Hewitt tends to not be a very social dorm.

Hewitt dorms get very humid and hot in the winter because the heaters are steam based and go on overkill. I don’t really know what you can do about that, but that’s something to be aware of. Also, bring surge protectors—my room last semester had several outlets but only on one side of the room, like, wut, who designed that. And, like in Brooks, the rooms are all painted awful bright colors with awful paint jobs, so wait on color coordination of any kind.

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